Sunday, May 25, 2008

Mr. Master Craftman, stripped of title!


That's right folks you heard it here first. Let me begin by letting you know how the competition is judged. The contestants are awarded 30 points for creativity, 30 points for durability, and 40 points for safety of completed projects.
Jeff Newman's fence and chicken coop were fabulous, scoring the top for both creativity and durability, however when put to the true test it came to our attention that safety was not on the list for Jeff Newman,scoring a lousy 0 points for safety. While out walking to the chicken coop he built, Jeff Newman tripped and cut his arm on the roof of the chicken coop, resulting in a 41/2 hour visit in the emergency room and 27 stitches. It has come to our attention that the chicken coops roof must be fixed to regain the title. And the contestant must also use his brain in upcoming accidents, and not ask for the super glue to fix his injury's that are more than an inch in length and a depth no deeper than 1/4 of an inch in depth. In the meantime if there our any of you wanting to nominate someone for the title of "Mr. Master Craftsman" please do so to this blog, and the panel will review his/her potential.

5 comments:

Mich said...

What?! And here I was just about to nominate Jeff for the national title. All my hopes and dreams of knowing someone who is a someone have been dashed...
Nicki, you'll have to go out and get a title somehow.

Anonymous said...

dear nicki, in regards to jeff's recent mishap i think there is one positive side to this-this scar will compliment all of the other scars on his arms from previous incidents.however i feel he should be demoted to "mr craftsman" until furthur notice until we can judge other upcoming projects and determine if safety has become a real priority to him. love dad.

Maurina said...

Only Jeff would manage to get cut like that. Good luck trying to regain your title

Anonymous said...

Rude...rude rude RUDE!!! The one at fault is Nicki, she did not take care of her husband the way that she should have...if she were good, she would have padded the edges of the razor sharp sheet metal roof edges so that nobody would get hurt, not her husband, her kids, friends or neighbors...I feel that she should loose the her "I take care of my husband" title as it was her fault that he was unfortunate enough to cut his arm on an edge that she could have taken care of knowing it was sharp. In light of this scandal, the title of "Mr. Master Craftsman" should be restored along with all rights and priveledges associated with the title.

Honestly Nicki, how can you call yourself a loving wife with actions such as these?

Sincerely,
People for the Mr. Master Craftsman Association. (PFTMMCA)

Brad.Lindsey.Lexi.Rowen said...

That is one of the funniest posts I have read. You're too cute. Tell Jeff I hope his arm gets better soon. Ouch!